I am home again, safe and sound - And almost alive.

11 days in England is over and I am home yet again. I was there from 11/9 - 22/9 this time. I don't remember the exact order in which we did everything this time, cause we did so much! Only one day did we spend at home, and I don't think we were home all that day either ^^

This time I planned where I wanted to go in Nottingham, and I had printed a tourist-map and written in addresses and whatnot for the things I wanted to do. Tommy's dad also had a couple of suggestions to what we should do, since this basically is the last of the summer. He and Tommy's mother were moving to Vietnam the day after I arrived. I hope they're doing fine there and not melting away completely :)

So! We went to Creswell crags! But when we arrived we found out that the cave-tours were only open during the weekends, and this was what.. Tuesday or Wednesday. So we had a walk around the lake and poked the caves, and decided to go back the following Sunday to have a proper look at the caves.

We visited a small beautiful town called Eyam - The town furthest north the plague got in England. It was very interesting, and a lovely little town to visit. I love the style, the small houses and how the town is "hidden" away like it is.

This was the first time we took the car to go to Nottingham. I suggested it becaue I wanted to do some shopping this time! Some "serious" shopping. Keep in mind that I am not really that good at it, but I had something special in mind this time - A dolphin mirror for my mum, and since I found out that my favourite online-shop is in Nottingham I decided to go there and have a "look".
The dolphin mirror have been stalking my mind for a while, since second time I was in England. I didn't think I could get it back home with me until now without breaking it, cause this time I had a new suitcase! It's mine, all mine, huge and turqoise with a skull-tag and a pink band around it just in case ^^ And! It's hard plastic! Dolphin mirrors will survive.

At Blue Banana (the emo-shop)I wasn't going to get anything cause I felt so bad for dragging Tommy around shopping. I know he hates it and I suck at it myself.. But I fell in love with a couple of hoodies and a pair of shoes! The lady who helped me there was funny, suggesting I should get a pair of skinny fit trousers cause it'd make my ass look perky and surely Tommy would pinch my ass then, haha... 0.o Well I didn't get those trousers, I am not into skinny fit trousers what-so-ever ^^

The normal visit to Ice Nine ofcourse, ended in a new pair of 12 mm ear tunnels, and stretchers up to 12 and 14 mm. We walked past a book-store that had a bullie-plushie I just had to get! Uhm, what else... Oh well. We had dinner at Friday's since I finally managed to find out that they DO have it in Nottingham allthough Tommy said he didn't think they did. Of course they do! :D It was very nice. And cheap!

After dinner we walked (ran) to get to the ghostwalk in time. It started at 07pm and we kept walking the wrong way, we thought... We got there in time - and we were not the only ones going! A man inside the pub where it started sold the tickets, he was wearing a cape, black top hat and had a coat with a skull on the collar :)

*More incoming*

Soon, so very soon.

I am so sleepy I can barely keep my eyes from closing... I can feel that I was supposed to be in bed today. A weekend off is desperately needed now.
Had another miniargument lasy night, extremely fun for both I think...

It's only 8 days now, isn't that weird... It's been 3 months, how fast those months passes by. It's been tough though, especially for my sanity (or the lack of). I really really want and need to go NOW.


- Spammed from my iPhone!

Thoughts of today! And randomness.

So! It's like ... Only 2 weeks left! Today! :D And that is 2 weeks until I'm back with my baby! My lover! My boy ^^

It has been almost 3 months of mess and confusion and stress, emotional shit from my side that we both could have well been without. I don't know how I turned out to be this hell of a female, but I am. And I'm seriously lucky to have a boyfriend who so far has handled me this well! I cant thank him enough for the patience, the support, and the love - I know it has been hard. Thank you for still being here for me and by my side.

I've had nightmares where he has been cheating, where he has dumped me, and they've been so "real" that when waking up I've felt so alone and lost. I've managed to take this out on him I think, poor man... But soon I'll see him! And if I have any nightmares when I'm there, I'll just turn toward him and hide in his hair or in his arms. How awesome that'll be! But I'll do that without any nightmares too.... 0:)

I am a paranoid creature, with no sense of self-worth (how can I say it...) or self-esteem. I'm a girl who thinks she's easily traded in and someone noone can love. Never am I, in my own imagination, good enough, pretty enough, funny enough, interesting, entertaining, worth while... And the list goes on, And on and on.... Aaand on - for anyone. I keep asking myself why he wants me. Why does he choose to be with me - this wreck of a fugly girl - when he can have anyone and even someone who is closer and sane :x
But I'm glad he still wants me. I'm still puzzled, but grateful.

Stupidly excited about going!! I can-not-wait! Gief it nauw!

My boy will -never- read this, but I had to let out some love-steam. Cause I'm damn lucky to have him <3
It's been a rocky road and it will keep popping up rocks along the way, but I hope he'll think it's worth it.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:You know, in my head and around...

Thoughts of today.

There are no reasons to why I should feel worthy, more or equally than other people.

There is no reason why I should feel good about myself.

There is no reason for me to like what I see in the mirror.

I should never think I can do anything.

I am a worthless pile of shit. No one loves me, and no one ever will. If they say they do, theyre either lying or havent realised yet that they really dont.

Dont I ever dare think differently.


- iPhonespamming

Wooohaw!

I am sooo tired, sleepy sleepy sleepy... Can't wait for a few days off, not that thats going to happen soon ;) But I'm a happy puppy! Things are not bad now at all, only a tiny bit bothered with backpain and migraine, but I've had worse ^^

I want to learn to draw cartoony stuffs! Oooh, I so want to.. I'll scout the web for whatever I can find, maybe there are books for rookies like me :)

In Geekyland I'm playing my mothers character to help her get heirlooms, and I am having fun doing that. It's almost like a geek-holiday :) Shammy healing also seems doable for a newb like me, can't wait to try that again.

Oh well - laters!


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:Oschlo

Restless and Wiiiiiiiild!

Or not so wild, but definitely restless! ^^

Been munching brownies all day! Well, 3 pieces but it feels like its been all day. I thought I was starting 1,5 hours earlier than I really did today, so I wad 2 hours to kill downtown. That made me find 2 new comicbooks and new trousers. I also have my new suitcase (oooohlala, Samsonite!) picked out. That one I'll buy tomorrow!

Later tonight I'll meet mum and pickup my new comics and the note for my post office where my parcel of new tees and stash from BlueBanana.com is waiting for me. Stoked!

Another thing I'm rather stoked about is that today its one month on they day 'til I'm going back to UK - The Land of Love! How awesome is that huh, the wait is soon over ^^

Tomorrow I also have a date with a girlfriend who is moving to UK soon to study. We'll wander around and have lunch for the last time before she moves. We don't spend much time together, so that'll be nice.

In Geek-land I'm as skitzo as ever. I decided I'd try and level the shammy-alt so she went from 36-42 in a rather short time thanks to a coupe of friends boosting-help. I only need around 6k gold for my huntress' Mammoth too, not bad.
Tonight I'll be mums boosting-slave again, on her new alt that she can't stop playing these days.

Uhm, what else... Don't know really. Just another boring rant from me.

ONE MONTH!! :D

Hmmm... Uninspired, geekytime!

WoW is stupidly fun these days. Finally having another lvl 80 huntress and I'm having much fun playing her. Now I'm thinking of a million things to do on her, and the druidess.
I have some "tiny" easy and difficult goals I want to reach on Gashna the huntress. Since she is an enchantress I have a few enchants to farm, which can be fun cause it would bring in some nice BC instance-achievs as well. She is also an alchemist, so even more bonuses from rep-farming ^^

So some of the goals I will try and reach on my dear green miss Huntress are :

- Farm rep with Timbermaw hold for Agi-ench
and Thorium Brotherhood for Strength-chant.

- Level fishing and cooking.

- Save money (16k gold) for the Mammoth!

- Try and find the rarespawn-wolf Ol'Cliff Jumper once again. It's my favorite pet in wow, prettiest.

- Trying to get the MC hunter-set, t1-set. Its so nice, good old memories. Still got some pieces on Nuiva.


Things that are only "dream" that I don't think I'll ever manage to do is to get netherdrakes and those netherrays or what they are called. I want Gash to be my "main" for achievs now, although Fariah has the most now. Fari for around 4k achiev-points and gash maybe 1k... I might get there some time, maaaybe.